NEW ORLEANS — The New Orleans Saints could play the Kansas City Chiefs or a group of preschool children, in either case with five minutes left in the contest it’d be a one-score game, I'm convinced of it. The Dennis Allen Saints are nothing if not consistent.
The Saints trailed 21-0 less than seven minutes into the game against the Detroit Lions and it looked for all the world as if we were headed for one of those 52-10 beatdowns where people need to get fired, not because firings would save a 2023 season already lost, but because when you get embarrassed at home in December and are 5-7 firing people is a sign that you respect your fan base and understand their pain.
Then the Saints did what they always do under Dennis Allen, they continued to fight and scrap and suddenly it was 33-28 and the Saints had the ball with a chance to win.
We saw this exact game three weeks ago in Minnesota. It even included the late Jameis Winston cameo. NFL script writers are getting lazy and I’m tired of the same old storylines.
Sunday’s game was wild, goofy, and the Saints had a real chance to beat a good team in the Lions. Of course, this being the 2023 Saints, mistakes and the defense’s inability to get a stop doomed them. Lions tight end Sam LaPorta just caught another first down while you are reading this column.
Dennis Allen’s Saints are like an old classic car. It looks amazing when you walk up to it, but when you go to drive it, something always breaks.
Saints fixed their red zone problems, mostly because the Lions are 30th in red zone defense, but improvement shall not be frowned upon here! Of course, the Saints offset their red zone improvement with two comically bad turnovers.
Juwan Johnson dropped a pass which the Lions intercepted, and Derek Carr fumbled when James Hurst ran into him. It was almost like Hurst was running to block someone too fast? I don’t know. I know that play needed circus music and a laugh track. True Saint's comedy.
The Dennis Allen Saints are always playing hard and forgetting the details.
The frustrating thing about Sunday was that’s as good as Derek Carr looked all season before he got hurt. He completed his last 15 passes, and looked confident, and had Saints' offense rolling in the second half. He was the slightly above-average quarterback we were promised!
The 2023 Saints aren’t allowed to have nice things so of course Carr got injured again. Carr is having a rough season, but that guy is a tough son of a gun. Way tougher than his previous reputation. Carr has taken massive hits, gotten hurt, and keeps coming back. He deserves a ton of credit for it.
The Saints did all the things Detroit’s defense is terrible at defending, like play-action and bootlegs. It was enjoyable seeing the Saints offense have a nice rhythm for a hot minute.
Chris Olave, Taysom Hill, and Alvin Kamara were all cooking. I won’t lie to myself or you and say the Saints finally unlocked something on offense. It’s December, there’s no solving stuff in December. It was just a nice glimpse of what we thought the Saints' offense could be but isn’t.
The Saints' defense continued the most New Orleans’ of traditions by sleeping in on Sunday and arriving well after kickoff. The Lions had 24 points at halftime but scored only 9 in the last 2 quarters, and 6 of those were a gift courtesy of the Saints' offense.
I could slap a Dennis Allen quote here about “chopping wood, play better, coach better, do your job” but I don’t want to. I’m over it.
Here's where I am with the 2023 Saints, they play the awful Carolina Panthers and dreadful Tommy DeVito led New York Giants the next 2 weeks. Win both or lose both but under no circumstances Saints do I want you to split both these games. Go ahead and win both and give me false hope for Christmas or lose both and slide right on into a top 5 draft pick.
Since the 2023 Saints are incapable of doing what we want them to do for a sustained period of time, I fully expect the Saints to be 6-8 two Mondays from today.
The 2023 Saints are only good at disappointing us, no matter what we ask them to do.
Ralph Malbrough is a contributing writer and Saints fan living in Houston. Email him at saintshappyhour@gmail.com, find him on Facebook, or follow him on Twitter at @SaintsForecast or download the Saints Happy Hour Podcast.