NEW ORLEANS — The New Orleans Saints' Dennis Allen era is beginning to look like the New Orleans Saints Mike Ditka era.
Now I know lots of you reading this column might be under 35 years old and your memories of the Mike Ditka-coached Saints are either non-existent or you have that one memory of Ditka sprawled out on the Superdome field after the Cleveland Browns beat the Saints on a Hail Mary in 1999 for their first victory since NFL football returned to Cleveland.
The Mike Ditka era with the Saints happened 25 years ago. It was a colossal failure of a dinosaur coach trying to win in the modern NFL, but if you look closely the end of the Mike Ditka era it looks suspiciously like the 2023 Dennis Allen Saints. Did that just send a shiver down your spine if you remember the Mike Ditka Saints?
Some of you might be thinking, "Ralph, why are you bringing up Mike Ditka and comparing him to Dennis Allen? This seems really mean and uncalled for."
I'll grant you it's pretty mean-spirited but Dennis Allen is 10-14 as Saints coach and the Saints just lost their 4th game in 5 weeks, went 3 of 18 on third downs, the red zone befuddles them like a blind man trying to solve a Rubik's Cube, and I'm just salty about watching the Saints be terrible in the worst division in football. FOR THE SECOND STRAIGHT YEAR.
Let's get back to why we are here: The 2023 Dennis Allen Saints look a lot like the 1999 Mike Ditka Saints because both teams found excruciating ways to lose close games early in the season.
Most of you probably just look at the 1999 Saints and think "3-13. God awful. Lost 13 of their final 15 games, including losing streaks of 7 and 5 games. Garden variety terrible. The Billy Joes at quarterback. Whatever."
Did you know the 1999 Saints started 1-0 and led their next 4 games in the fourth quarter? Not only that, but the Saints led 3 of those games by DOUBLE DIGITS at halftime!
Crazier still? They led the Chicago Bears 10-0 at the 2-minute warning! 10-0 and somehow lost even after the Bears scored to make it 10-7, and the Saints recovered the onside kick and ran for a first down. How is that even possible? Honestly, I think I just blocked that entire game from my memory for mental well-being purposes.
The 1-6 Saints would lose on a last-second Hail Mary to the Browns in Week 8 and wouldn't have another loss by single digits the rest of the season. They'd effectively quit on Mike Ditka the moment the Browns started celebrating their miraculous win. The Saints would finish 1999 getting humiliated 45-13 in Carolina.
All those early season close losses piling up look a lot like the 2023 Saints. Do we give the Dennis Allen Saints more or less credit for not blowing four straight second half leads?
I don't think the Saints will quit on Allen like the 1999 Saints clearly did on Ditka, but there's always a point with every coach on a hot seat where too many close losses pile so high it's over. The next three weeks are going to determine which direction this Saints season will go.
As Deuce Windham pointed out on Twitter, Ditka's 1998 offense which started four different quarterbacks, averaged 19 points while the 2023 Saints also average 19 points except they are doing it with Alvin Kamara, Mike Thomas, Chris Olave, Rashid Shaheed, and a $150 million quarterback.
Ditka inherited a 3-13 team. Dennis Allen inherited a 9-8 team that barely missed the playoffs.
The Saints face the Gardner Minshew Colts, the Tylar Bagent Bears, and the Vikings without star receiver Justin Jefferson. If it ain't going to happen for Dennis Allen these next three weeks, it ain't gonna happen.
By the way, Mike Ditka's Saints record through 24 games was 10-14. Dennis Allen through 24 games 10-14.
We probably need to stop comparing Dennis Allen to Jim Haslett, as that's insulting to Jim Haslett, because, through 24 games as Saints coach, Haslett was 14-10.
The Saints are in the bad Mike Ditka place, the only question is will Dennis Allen get them out?
Saints Mood and Meditation Music: 400 Degreez – Juvenile (featuring Mannie Fresh)
Can't give you a link because of language issues but just go to YouTube and search Juvenile Tiny Desk. This performance is magic. All we have to survive this terribly disappointing season is music and jokes. The Saints won't ruin our Sundays. We gonna crank up the music cause that's what New Orleans do.
The Games
Last Week: 2-3
Season: 17-13
Indianapolis (-1) vs New Orleans: The Colts are sixth in points scored but 30th in points allowed. We've reached the point in 2023 where if the Saints can't crank up the offense against a team giving up 350 yards and 27 points a week AND gave up 39 points to the PJ Walker quarterbacked Browns all hope is dead on offense.
The Colts defense is bad but their offense is fun, imaginative and scoring a bunch of points even though quarterback Gardner Minshew has four interceptions and has fumbled five times. The good news for the Saints is Dennis Allen has stuffed Minshew in a locker both times his defense has faced Gardner.
Last year the Saints defeated the Minshew-led Eagles 20-10. Allen's defense sacked him six times, forced two fumbles and Marshon Lattimore had a game-clinching pick-6. In 2019 Minshew Mania was in full bloom and the Saints went to Jacksonville and held Minshew to 14-29 passing for 163 yards in a 13-6 win. Dennis Allen killed Minshew Mania like he was Jason Voorhees rampaging at Camp Crystal Lake.
Here's the thing with Dennis Allen; he's never going to be terrible. He'll never be "the plug fell out of the boat 4 or 5 win atrocious coach," because his defense is too good. The trouble for Allen is there's always going to be something keeping the Saints from getting above average. Penalties, drops, wrong route, wrong coverage. A decent Saints team will always feel right there somewhere if they can just find it.
This week it'll be the defense letting them down as the offense looks good. Always something.
Colts 35-31
Atlanta (-2.5) at Tennessee: The Falcons are about to stop turning the ball over and get on the road to 10-7 and winning the NFC South. I hate this football season SO MUCH.
Falcons 23-14
Tampa Bay (+8.5) at Buffalo: The Bills are too injured on defense to be favored by more than a touchdown over anyone.
Bills 23-16
Cincinnati (+3.5) at San Francisco: The NFC being mediocre everywhere except Philadelphia is disgusting. If the Saints were just average on offense we could be having so much fun.
Bengals 24-20
Kansas City (-7) at Denver: If Mickey Loomis trades that 2024 Broncos second round pick at the trade deadline, I'm organizing protest marches.
Chiefs 35-17
Ralph Malbrough is a contributing writer and Saints fan living in Houston. Email him at saintshappyhour@gmail.com, find him on Facebook, or follow him on Twitter at @SaintsForecast or download the Saints Happy Hour Podcast.